From Silence to Stories- Why I Began Writing at 40
This is the story of how, after decades of self-doubt, societal expectations, and procrastination, I finally let go of fear, embraced freedom, and discovered the pure joy of writing at 40.
Introduction
Writing has always been my aspiration, a dream I nurtured silently for years. For years, I hesitated to take that first step, telling myself it wasn’t the right time. It wasn’t until I turned 40 that I finally decided to break free from my own excuses. This blog is a candid reflection on the winding road to embracing my passion for writing—a journey filled with self-doubt, transformation, and ultimately, liberation.
Early Aspirations
Discovering the Spark
I was in fourth grade when I first felt the thrill of writing. It was like standing in the middle of a magical storm of ideas—colors, characters, and stories swirling around me, begging to be captured. The possibilities felt endless, and my young mind was alive with wonder.
The Elusive Ideas
But those ideas were fleeting, like soap bubbles shimmering in the sun. I’d reach out, desperate to catch them, only to watch them vanish just as quickly. Writing felt like a game I couldn’t win—a pursuit that left me exhilarated yet frustrated. Every time I tried to pin my thoughts to the page, they slipped away, leaving behind a quiet void.
Seeking Help
A Friend’s Indifference
Frustrated by my inability to write, I turned to the smartest person I knew—a classmate who was always top of our class. I poured my heart out, hoping he’d have a magical solution. His response? An eye roll and a dismissive, “How can I help you with that?” His indifference stung. It crushed my fragile confidence and added years of silence to my writing dreams.
The Impact of Education
A Bad Teacher can Screw Your Life
Adding to my struggles was my English teacher—a grumpy, uninterested man who seemed to resent his own subject. His apathy made learning the language feel like a chore. For years, I blamed him for the gaps in my writing skills and my inability to articulate my thoughts.
A Glimmer of Hope
It wasn’t until the tenth grade that I met an English teacher who truly inspired me. She made writing feel exciting, even possible. But by then, I felt like too much time had passed, as though I’d missed the window to truly master the craft.
The Weight of Procrastination
Wrestling with Self-Doubt
The years rolled on, and my mind remained a whirlwind of untold stories. But procrastination and fear became my constant companions. I told myself I wasn’t ready, wasn’t good enough, didn’t have the time. The excuses piled up, and the stories in my head stayed trapped, swirling restlessly.
Escaping into Television
Instead of writing, I lost myself in the worlds of OTT platforms. I became a storyteller in my own way, dissecting plots and predicting endings. But deep down, I knew I was running away from my own stories—stories that deserved to be written.
A Life-Changing Moment
The Wake-Up Call
Then came COVID-19. The pandemic turned life upside down and forced me to confront my own unhappiness. I realized how fleeting life could be, how small my fears were in the face of life’s uncertainty. It was a wake-up call, a reminder to stop waiting and start living.
Choosing Joy
With this clarity, I made a promise to myself: I would no longer live under the weight of judgment or expectations. I let go of the need for validation, approval, and labels. No more strings attached. I shed the burdens of discipline, hard work, higher aims, and questions like, Where do you see yourself in five years? I stripped away everything that felt heavy or forced.
What remained was pure joy. I gave myself permission to simply do the things that made me happy, for as long as they brought me happiness. No targets, no plans—just a commitment to live authentically and embrace what felt right in the moment.
Breaking Free
From Screens to Pages
One evening, I did something bold: I put down the remote and picked up a book. It seemed like a small act, but it changed everything. In that moment, I discovered the richness of the written word and the depth and beauty of storytelling. The newfound love for books naturally developed an aversion to TV, as I realized how much more fulfilling it was to lose myself in pages rather than pixels.
Taking the Leap
I finally gave myself permission to write, free from fear of failure. It didn’t matter if my sentences stumbled or my stories felt incomplete. What mattered was that I was finally doing it—writing purely for myself, with no strings or expectations attached. I allowed myself to flow with joy, doing what felt right until it no longer did. It was freeing to be untethered, to create without the burden of seeking validation from others—no concern for likes, views, or subscribers. It was just me, my words, and the freedom to express.
Finding Joy in Writing
Effortless Flow
As soon as I let go of my fears and the need to prove myself, the words began to flow. Stories I’d carried for years found their way onto the page, bringing with them a sense of freedom I hadn’t felt in a long time. Writing became a joy, a release, a homecoming.
In today’s world, if you have a strong desire to write, there are countless resources to support you—friends, writing workshops, or tools that make the journey easier. Unlike my childhood friend, who made me feel foolish for sharing my aspirations, I’ve now found a true companion in my writing. If you look for it, you’ll find your best ally too—someone or something that helps you embrace your passion.
Conclusion
The Weightlessness of Freedom
Looking back, I realize that we often suffer more in our minds than in reality. Once I let go of self-imposed limits and the need to label or justify my choices, the world opened up. I feel lighter now, unburdened by fear or doubt, free to explore the possibilities of my creativity.
A Message to Dreamers
To anyone who feels stuck or afraid to pursue their dreams: take the leap. Shed the expectations, the labels, the pressure to conform. Embrace your passions, make a joyful noise, and share your stories. Whether it’s writing, painting, singing, or anything else that speaks to your heart, take that leap. Resources and support exist in abundance if you seek them—friends, communities, and tools that can become your companions on this journey. Let go of the idea that you need to have a plan or a higher purpose. Do what makes you happy, for as long as it makes you happy.
Life is too short to wait for the perfect moment. Start now, and watch how it transforms not just your world, but you. There is nothing to prove—Let your voice be heard, and watch as it transforms your world.
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Forgotten Voices
As children, we all possess a remarkable clarity of purpose. Guided by our inner voices, we effortlessly gravitate towards activities that ignite our passions and bring us joy. Whether it's painting, playing sports, or exploring the world around us, our inner voice serves as a trusted ally, leading us towards pursuits that resonate with our true selves.
It's amazing how ceertain dreams appear in childhood,get almost erased for the longest time & resurface one fine day. So nice to see you kickstarting your passion to write. Best of best, and enjoy it!